Katniss, Come Home
by Saphira.Flametongue
Summary: My brave, darling, strong sister is broken. She never goes out into the woods anymore. I don't know where she disappears to – those hours that she's gone. Because when she comes back home and hugs me, she doesn't smell of fresh pines anymore.


_**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **_

_**A/N: **_

_**Yup, this concludes my very first HG fanfic! I've always wondered how Prim would react to the 'new' version of Katniss after the games, and yes, I guess I've over-dramatised it xD This little scene kept popping up in my head, and I just couldn't get rid of it! **_

_**Tell me what you guys think! **_

_**Reviews are love 3**_

KATNISS, COME HOME

A few months have gone by since the Games. The days blending into each other. For the first time in our lives – or anyone in district 12, for the matter – we have enough food on the table for leftovers.

Everyone was happy. They were smiling, laughing, pretending that the Games didn't happen, like my sister never went into the Arena and fought against children half her size and twice her size. Like my sister didn't have to watch little Rue die. Like my sister never had to kill another to survive. They were lost in their happy little bubble – all of them.

They call her the Girl on Fire, now. Not Katniss. As though her whole personality revolves around the small sliver that was shown on live television. Didn't they understand that Katniss was – is – so much _more_?

And that made me so, so angry.

Sometimes, it seems to me like I am the only one that can see the vagueness in Katniss' eyes, along with a select few. The look of distant horror, imagining things only she could see. The way her movements are jerky. The way she constantly seems to be on guard. The way she never laughs anymore. The way the fire in her eyes is diminished. The way she sometimes reaches for an invisible weapon. The way her face sometimes crumples when she looks at me – and it _hurts_, like an arrow piercing through my heart, because I know all she can see then is Rue.

Katniss is broken. My brave, darling, strong sister is broken. She never goes out into the woods anymore. I don't know where she disappears to – those hours that she's gone. Because when she comes back home and hugs me, she doesn't smell of fresh pine and all those other forest-y smells anymore.

And my heart aches.

She's lost so much, given up so much of herself for me. Sometimes, I wonder if it would have been better for her if she had died in the Games. And I know that she thinks the same way, too, sometimes, because when I tiptoe to her room to check on her, I can see her crying and looking at the bunch of blueberries she's put in her room – wishing they were something else.

It's like she doesn't care about living anymore. Those little things that used to make her happy? They don't, now. Her eyes only light up when Peeta comes to visit, when he hugs her so tenderly, as though she would break at any moment. And she doesn't protest. Maybe it's because she knows it's true. Or... Sometimes I think... She's given up. On everything.

Every day that passes, I feel her drifting away. She's here, but it's like her mind's a thousand miles away, back at the Arena, back when she was still fighting for her life.

And now...

Tears overflow, streams of silvery liquid winding rivers down my cheeks. My hand goes to my heart – because I feel it _hurting_, an ache deep inside me that can't be quenched. I crouch down, a distance away to where Katniss was huddled on the kitchen floor, grey eyes eerily lifeless, strains of what is now dubbed 'Rue's Lullaby' drifting from her.

/_Here the daisies guard you from every harm_ /

I cry out to her, beg her, plead with her to come back to me. To come _home_.

_/Here your dreams are sweet/_

I'm really crying down, taking huge, shuddering breaths as I reach out to her, shaking her harshly.

_/and tomorrow brings them true /_

"Katniss! Katniss, _please_! Come _home_!"

_/Here is the place/_

My voice breaks, and I search her eyes, only to find her fire completely extinguished.

_/where I love you. /_

"I love you too, Katniss," I whisper brokenly. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for letting you volunteer. For not being strong enough."

_/where I love you. /_

"But I'll be strong enough this time, Katniss," I vow, shuffling closer to her and hugging her, even though she's completely unresponsive. "I'll take care of you now. Everything will be alright now. You're safe. You're home."

And my heart cracks just a bit more when she doesn't reply, staring off into the distance, to a place where I can't follow her.

I'll get you back, Katniss. I'll get you back home.

_/Here is the place/_

No matter what it takes. I'll bring you home. And Gale, too. And Mum, and Hazel, and Rory, and Peeta, and Madge.

_/where I love you. /  
_  
We'll bring you home to us.

_/where I love you. /_

I love you too, Katniss, forever and ever.

-END-


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